I feel that I'm sinking deeper and deeper.......I continue to face hurts, disappointments and let downs.
People lie, cheat, steal and slowly and surely they destroy your faith in humankind. They help destroy the trust you have in people, they destroy your confidence, make you think you aren't a good judge of character, make you suspicious of everyone else, don't hold up their end of an agreement, don't make good their promises........promises made before a third party and in the name of God.
They profess to being good Christians, but how can that be when they have stolen, lied to you, gone back on their word and treated you badly........that's certainly not my definition of being a Christian. How they can hold their head up in church is beyond me.......I guess I have to trust that God WILL judge them one day......but the damage for me and my family seems irrepairable right now. It took me years to trust people, years to believe and years to even think I had any hope........the further I sink down, the further away these seem......too far away to grasp onto.
My world has gone back to being black again......black and lonely.........and so full of hurt.
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4 comments:
Hi,
I just came across this blog after surfing the web and after reading your post, I feel compelled to comment. I hope you are doing okay. I know that times can get dark and people can dissapoint you. I've dealt with depression and dissapointment too. I don't know your exact situation but it sounds like you have been dissapointed by some people you thought were Christians. I have also been hurt by people calling themselves Christians, but I learned that walking away from God because of those people was the wrong thing to do. I realized that those people didn't represent the love of God and I shouldn't let them stop me from having a personal releationship with Him. I hope you are doing well and I hope you know that even though times are dark, you will come out on the other side. You really will- you just have to hold on and ask for help. We all need help sometimes. Good luck and I hope to hear an update soon.
Hi- Like the other commenter, I also came across your blog while blog surfing. It worries me that you haven't written for so long... I'm praying that you're ok!!! Bloggers are a supportive group of folks... please know that "we" are all here for you! I wish I had words of wisdom for you in regard to this situation- but the truth is that I stuggle with what appears to be a lot of the same stuff. What I find comfort in, and I'm hoping you will too, is that God knows our hurt- He weeps with us... He saw what was done and He will deal with it. My priest, whom I talk with a lot, has reminded me quite a bit lately of the scripture, "Yea, though I walk THROUGH the valley of the shadow of death...". He reminds me that we need to keep walking and focusing on the Light at the other end. The darkness wont last forever... I promise!!! Please write an update when you feel led. Know that I'm praying for you!!
Peace and Healing-
Michele
I, too, came across your blog by accident.
I feel so for you. I can just say pray, pray, pray. It's only then that we can move on and see the good in people- even when they fail us. After all, they are all children of God sometimes succeeding, sometimes failing. Ask for God's heart for them.
Remembering you in prayer,
Marge
You might want to see this Christian documentary film about this woman with an amazing faith. The film is called Katie's Prayer and its available on Amazon.com This film has changed many lives and brought deeper walks among Christians who see it. You might want to check it out and share it with others who you feel need to see it. Deeper walk with Jesus? Check it out:
http://www.amazon.com/Katies-Prayer/dp/B008KC7ZOE/ref=sr_1_1?s=instant-video&ie=UTF8&qid=1342721404&sr=1-1&keywords=katie%27s+prayer
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