Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Strongholds......

...steal our freedom.
...end up holding us captive.
...are our hiding places.
...pretend to give us something we feel we must have (aid, comfort, protection)

I have a huge stronghold on my life. Built over many years, because I thought it was protecting me, but all too late I realise I am it's prisoner. I want it gone, I hate it being there......but at the same time I like to hide in that place sometimes, where I think I'm safe. On days when I feel strong, I shout out against it......."Go away, leave me alone, I'm not going to believe in you anymore...." I wonder why I think shouting at the tower of bricks I've built around myself, cemented in place over years and years, will suddenly fall away because I've said I don't want it there anymore. It can't happen that way - and it won't happen that way. There is only one way to demolish my stronghold, and that way is with God. After my bible study today, I had this picture about me and my stronghold and I'd like to share...

Imagine a narrow tower thats been built around you, tall and strong. Every brick has it's own reason for being placed in that tower, 'pain', 'hurt', 'lies', 'deceit', 'withdrawal', 'loneliness', 'violence', 'adandonment'....each one supporting the surrounding bricks....and giving every other brick strength to stay in place.
Now picture how dark and cold it is living in that tower. If you're lucky, once a day, when the sun is directly overhead, warmth and light will reach you in the tower, and you will feel good......but what about the days when there are clouds in the sky. Weak light and little warmth might reach you, but it might not, life isn't so good then. So you decide to break out. You chip away at one of the bricks, maybe you choose 'lies', you loosen it enough that you can poke it out - success!!! You can now see out and feel some warm air close to the hole. Clean air smells so good, so good that you want more of it, so you take out another brick, it doesn't matter which one as you are determined to break out. Eventually, you make a hole big enough to step out of the tower. You think you've made it, on the floor you see the broken bricks of 'pain' 'hurt' 'lies' 'deceit' etc., but you don't look back at the tower and see more of those bricks still standing tall. You feel triumphant and for a while you enjoy your freedom. You enjoy the warmth of the sun, life feels great.
Then, your old enemy 'insecurity' shows up again.......you start to look for somewhere to hide. There is your tower, just waiting. There may be a gaping hole in the side, but when you pop your head back inside you can see there are still shadows to hide amongst.....and it's so easy to climb back in. After a while you may chose to break open another hole when you feel strong enough, or you may keep using the original one to access your freedom. The point is this though, we don't want to just make holes in our towers. We want, and need, to demolish them once and for all, so there is nowhere to return to. We don't have the strength to knock out every brick, let alone crush them into dust - but God does. Give Him your all, bare your soul to Him and He will give you HIS all - His strength, power, love, encouragement, rest, peace......and His victory.
What happens then, if 'insecurity' shows up again??? You may look round for your tower, out of habit, but you will see there is nowhere to turn but God. God is our new tower - not to hide in, but our tower of strength and truth to stand upon and stare down 'insecurity' until it shrinks away. And never again will we have to go back into the dark.

Thursday, May 03, 2007

My Lifesong......

I have been listening to Casting Crowns "Lifesong" album.........and one song that seems to be "my" song is "And Now My Lifesong Sings"..........I absolutely adore this song, it just seems to sum me and my life up completely.........

Hear it here....